And Fox is saying hello this evening. ‘Hello’ I whisper.
I have written before about my true blessing of having childhood friends still with me at this time. For over fifty years of life, a pocket full of friends who shared the early times, the grazed knees and bicycle jaunts, still remain, and it is to them I return for validation when life gets just a little too much.
To find more are spilling into my life. Thank you Facebook for today, whilst planning my trip home, a message from a friend I grew up with, wanting to say ‘hi’ again. The swimming forever friend who, and I did not know, has been through much, and meeting up with her again when I go ‘home’.
What was interesting was her message. She is happy, fulfilled, and yet longs too for the connections of those who knew, not only her, but her family. Parents passed. I have not seen her for nearly thirty years and the connection is as strong as ever. And I am keen to hear it all … the journey. Like mine. Those days of whispering about who we will marry (had to be dreamy) , how many children we will have, how successful we shall be – and now, bless us, how much we just want to return to the roots.
Believe me, it is not about missing. Not about being disappointed in how things turned out, how life has handed us love and lemons. About the halcyon days of wonder is what we reach for. The clean slate days. We want to connect for we remember the parents, the childhood homes, schooldays and all that. We want to be close to purity. Our purity in childhood. And talk about life in-between. Be proud of what we have become, the children we have raised, relationships we had, the paths followed, to in a sense, bring us together again to say ‘ we did ok’ and have someone else say ‘wow’ you did ALL that and good on you.
To talk of our parents. Of Sunday afternoons in a small town. Of sports days and how terrible we were at hurdles. First crushes and surfboard necklaces that meant we were going steady. Of nuns on bicycles and those awful matric dance dresses. We want to remember stealing peaches from the neighbours, swimming in rivers and Gatsy themed birthday parties. Television crush idols. When just breathing was enough. Just being was enough.
I did not know she had lost a sister. One I remember and life let me forget.
Did the ballet lessons pay off?
Did the education pay off?
Did love happen?
Did we become the people we thought we would?
Doesn’t matter. We lived. We loved. We are still the same, deep down and we want to know. We want to connect. We are blessed if we can.
Growing up in a small town does this. We had nothing else but each other and when life and times move us into different places, into other avenues, it is really good to go back and just say ‘you knew me’ and perhaps, just perhaps, those are the friends we have to be with at this stage. Friends who sang the songs, danced in the living room, wrote in the diaries and went to the drive in. To dream of better.
And perhaps we did get ‘the better’. We did live the dream. And old friends, childhood friends are the validation that we came from that to this, and make us proud.
Childhood friends have a bond that transcends to lifetime friends. And I am so blessed to still be able to say .. you knew me well, and you are still here.
Images: smartgirlsgroup, relationsmatters